There is no room in Poly or BDSM for lies. Lies will destroy all types of relationships. Don’t let the lies make you question yourself, or your worth. This isn’t just about Dominants either, trust me I know some submissives that are just as guilty.
IF you care so little about that person, end the relationship, in a respectful way. How you handle yourself during situations like this will reflect on reputation, as it should. As a community, we should watch out for this type of deceitful behavior, and protect those that have unfortunately been trapped in a web of lies.
Those that are being lied to, seek help from a member in the community, in real life or on line. Get out of your situation, especially if it’s abusive (mental, physical or sexual). Afterwards, take this time to grow as a person in the community because you never know when you might be returning the favor.
Those types of people, especially the ones that lie and don’t care about the persons well being, are not true to the lifestyle, don’t deserve respect or any self given title (usually Master).
I personally have experienced this, was told there was no one else, when there was. Which is why most people think poly means you can and are cheating. To protect all members in the relationship, be upfront and honest about your other relationship(s)/partner(s). I was also lied to about where he was and who he was with, when he was suppose to be with me. I questioned myself when he wouldn’t own up to his actions, instead of questioning him for not being an actual Dom. I hope my experience can shed some light on how cancerous a single lie can be. Also those that are being lied to, DONT allow them to break you, DONT buy into their bullshit. Walk away, with your head high, because you are better than them, deserve better AND will find better.
~Jen
